（153） 如何选择才幸福? How to choose will be happiness ?

（153）
如何选择才幸福?
How to choose will be happiness ?

好的缘分是可遇不可求，不是说你有钱就能掌握拥有的姻缘。但是，没有"面包"的爱情也很难维持幸福的日子。因此，一般人都会为自己设下了选择配偶的条件。当遇到的配偶有你所设定的条件时，你们真的会幸福吗? 答案是-------不一定!
Good fate can not be demanded, it is not because you are rich of money can be able to master it. But, it will be very difficult to maintain day of happiness with no "bread"for your love. Therefore, most people will set some conditions for their spouse selection. When you have met a spouse who comes with the conditions of what you have set, are you really happy? The answer is: Not Necessarily !

如果你已经是有钱有地位又何必要找有钱有地位的配偶?
If you are already rich and in a high status, why should you also want to find a rich and high position spouse?

如果你已经拥有高学历又何必也要找同样高学历的配偶?
If you already have an advanced degree of education level, why do you also want to find a spouse with the same high education level?

(当然一个有受教育和没受教育的人长期在一起是很难会幸福，因为两人思想的"距离"相差甚远。
Of course, it's hard to be happy in long term with someone who is educated and uneducated, because the "gap" between both minds are very far distance.）

其实选择幸福是在于"人心" !
"人心"影响了"人性"，"人性"影响了你的幸福人生!
In fact, the choice of happiness lies in the "heart"!
"Human heart" affects "humanity" and "humanity" affects your happy life!

选择的主要条件应该是:
The main conditions of choice should be:

***心地善良而不是心机太重的人; 心机重的人很容易妒忌和疑心重。真正心地善良的人会让你过得安心，心机重的人会让你过得不安。
* * * the person is kind-hearted but not scheming; those scheming people are easily jealous and suspicious. Real kind-hearted people will make you feel at ease, the scheming people will make you feel anxiety.

***心胸宽广的人。因为与这样的人相处会比较舒服，没压力，不记仇或记恨, 生活遇到困难有商量。心胸宽广的人，肚量大，不会因为你的失言而记在心里。
***Broad-minded people. It would be more comfortable to get along with such kind of people, no pressure, do not hold a grudge, when met difficulties in life is able to have mutual discussion. Broad-minded man is magnanimous, and would not keep in mind as you have made a slip of tongue.

***道德价值观也很重要。夫妻本来就是互补长短，而不是斗本事。夫妻的价值观相近，比较容易得到协调，沟通/交流才不会有隔阂。这就是为什么有些不同宗族结婚后还能白头偕老。
***Moral Value Concepts are also very important. Couples are meant to complement each other, not to fight for capability. If the value concept of the husband and wife is similar, it is more easily coordinated, the communication will not have estrangement. That's why some different races of couples can grow old together after they get married.

***懂得珍惜和尊重你的人。夫妻互相懂得尊敬, 很自然就会得到珍惜。如果只有单方付出和尊重，会很累，生活在一起也没有意义。
***People who know how to cherish and respect you. The husband and wife know to respect each other, so it will naturally be cherished. If only one-sided pay for and respect, it will be very tired, living together also has no meaning.

懂得互相尊重就会互相珍惜，得到了珍惜自然就会互相感恩。
Know to respect each other will gain mutual cherishment, once get the treasure of cherishment, naturally will be grateful to each other.

***真正懂得关心你的人。懂得真正关心你的人是不会嫌弃或背弃你，更不会处处与你斤斤计较。会嫌弃你的人不是真心爱你的人，总有一天会背弃离开你。当遇到这样的人时就别再留恋了，把珍贵的时间留给真正关心你的人。
***People who really know to care about you. The person who really care about you will not abandon or betray you,  even would  not to the point of hanggle over every ounce. The person who will abandon you is not the person who truly loves you. One day, he/she will betray to leave you. When you meet someone like this, don't linger and leave your precious time to those who really care about you.

***信任你的人。夫妻不能互相信任又怎能相处融洽细水长流? 夫妻之间的信任可以让一个家庭变得更加强大。
***the person who trusts on you. How can couples get along when they can't trust each other? Trust between husband and wife can make a family become stronger.

要记得，幸福才能更强大哦！
Remember, happiness can be more powerful !

幸福的婚姻不是商场上的买卖，当结为夫妻后就是家人的一分子，如果你的家人做得不够好，难道你会赶你的家人走或离开他吗？
Happy marriage is not a business in the market. Once already married, the husband and wife is a member of the family. If your family does not do well enough, will you drive your family member to go or leave him/her?

当然爱情在婚后还有许多需要学习的地方，但不是单方面的。
Of course, love in a marriage still has many aspects to learn after marriage, but not unilaterally.